If I could go back…

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I have been thinking a lot lately if I could go back and tell my younger self about everything going on now what would I say. I think the first thing I would say is you’re so much stronger than you think. You struggle through so much later on and you always get through it no matter what. The sun will always come up again tomorrow and your world is not ending today.  Next I would say let those stupid boys break your heart so when the man of your dreams shows up you’ll realize this is how your supposed to be treated. Have patience because he is worth heart break and the wait. You will have a best friend by your side for life.  The last two things are the most important. I would tell her that weight-loss is not impossible. Dont give up because it will cause you a lot of pain later. You will miss out on things that you really want to do because you’re self conscious about your weight. Don’t miss out on life anymore.  Lastly,  I don’t think I would tell her about the miscarriage but I would say when things get to the point where all you want to do is scream and cry,  just do it. You are so strong already but most days you are stronger than you need to be. Grieving for something you’ve lost is okay and people understand that. Also, I would say rely on your husband. You are in this together and he cares for you so much.he is by your side for everything. He even lost weight with you and has been your main support through everything. I think that’s what I would tell my younger self. I am a much stronger and happier person than. I was back then. 

I am up another pound. I’m pretty sure I’m just bloated. I hope after this week is over it goes back down. I just want to cheat so bad. Every time I’m doing good and still gaining it makes me feel like I should just cheat because it’s going to go up anyways. I know I can’t. This is just a bump in the road and I have to get through it. I’m going to tough it out and hopefully I will go down some and get where I need to be. 

I skipped breakfast 

For lunch I had a couple p3 protein packs. 2g carbs. 

For dinner I had a chicken salad. 11g carbs. 

For a snack I had some cheese cubes and a turkey hotdog. 1g carb. 

Total carbs for the day 14g. Over my 10g carb goal by 4 but still not bad. 

I drank my 100oz of water today. 

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